Sometimes, I marvel at just how technology is involved in our lives. My car at home has a USB port where I can connect my iPhone. My TV, sound system and DVD player sync through HDMI cables. My computer connects seemingly miraculously through the air to wireless networks to the internet. Technology has even begun to alter the social construct of interpersonal communication. I am not particularly interested in the ins and outs. I am also not even concerned with having the latest and greatest gadgets. I know when I get home that my phone will be three or four generations old. It still works and I am happy about that. What I am not happy about is how easily technology invites sin and temptation into my life.
The internet has made pornography instantly accessible to anybody. At this time, I am convinced that pornography is only unavailable to those who actively choose to not to entertain it. I have chosen to make myself unavailable to it. There are many men in the unit who don't struggle with porn but invite it into their lives. I think at the moment I am the only one trying to avoid it. It is also interesting to be the only person in my platoon that actively seeks to go to church at all. I am sure that many of these guys pray when they think about it and many have yet to come to experience Jesus.
But I actively seek Jesus and that has set me apart. I wouldn’t say I’ve encountered persecution because of my faith but faith has become the butt of a joke or two. Rather than become offended, I roll with it. I have become convinced of the greatness of God and the greatness of his strength and mercy. God does not need me to aggressively defend him. God does not need anything from me at all. But God does call me to witness to his love and mercy. The other day, I made sure to let my leadership know that I was planning on going to Mass. One of my leaders said, “well that’s stupid.” I simply replied, “I know, but I need it all the same.” And that was the end of it. I am sure that it was only said to get a rise out of me so I don’t let it bother me.
I want people to encounter authenticity of faith when they encounter me. I am not her to win converts, though I would not mind it. My goal is not necessarily to get others to become Catholic, but rather to build my relationship with Jesus in such a way that it attracts other people to want and build a relationship with him as well. My strength and resolve to do this comes from the Mass and reconciliation. And thanks to technology, and that there is an app for that, I can pray through the Mass when I cannot go to the Mass (but I still have to wait for a priest for confession). And that is what I have done today.
It is interesting how the Collect, the prayer following the confiteor in the opening of the Mass, is like a teaser for the Mass. The Collect today asks that the Lord grant us “perseverance in obeying your will, that in our days the people dedicated to your service may grow in both merit and number.” The first theme in the prayer which we will find in the readings is perseverance. The second theme is the fruit of evangelization of holy people. Before I reflect on those two themes for today, I’d like to note that the Collect for today is also a humble prayer that reminds us as we share those words who exactly is responsible for the conversion of souls. The prayer reminds us that we ask the Lord to strengthen us to do his will and that our holy example inspires others to follow the Lord as well. God can changes hearts, but I cannot. God can save souls, but I cannot. God can do all things, but I can only trust and follow the Lord.
The first reading from the Book of Numbers gives to us the theme of perseverance. The Israelites complained to the Lord and the Lord disciplined them. I once had a friend tell me that if you show yourself (negatively) to your boss, he will show you exactly who he is. God showed the Israelites who he was when he led them from slavery and through the desert. God did not want that the Israelites should die but it seems that for the Israelites, and I find it is true for me as well, that I can only see the love and mercy of God when something good happens after something very bad. For the Israelites it was the snakes. Upon repentance, the Lord gave them healing from snakebites.
The Gospel for today is Jesus speaking to the Pharisees and he telling them who he is and who they are. Jesus is distinguishing between his divine, yet human nature and the human nature of the Pharisees. Where he goes, the Pharisees cannot. But if they believe in him, they will live. If they don’t, then they will die in sin. He spoke and many came to believe. His words indicated a perseverance in faith despite the fact that he will be lifted up, which we know today is his reference to his own death. The fruit of the discourse by Jesus was that many came to believe.
Perhaps, in our own Catholic way, by imitating the Lord’s example and living in humility and charity, many will come to know Jesus and believe in him.
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